‘My sister-in-law wants us to change our wedding date – it’s causing a rift’

A woman is at a loss with what to do after her partner’s sister hints to the couple that she wants them to change their wedding date she’s known about for months

Two women arguing
She’s worried it’s causing a rift (stock photo)

With Covid having led to a backlog of wedding ceremonies, venue availability and suppliers are currently like gold dust.

While it’s tricky to find a date that will suit everyone, one couple had managed to keep everyone happy with theirs.

However, the bride-to-be took to Mumsnet to reveal that her sister-in-law was now disgruntled with the chosen date, despite having known about it for months.

She wrote: “Everyone seemed fine with this [date], so we went ahead and started making arrangements for our chosen date.

“Our date is ideal because it’s a week before school holidays, so we can take our honeymoon during the school holiday week, and we have two young kids who would otherwise need to be at school during this time, so it all works in perfectly.

“A few days back, I messaged the family group chat to excitedly talk about how much progress has been made for our chosen date.”

She doesn’t want to change the wedding date (stock photo)


Getty Images)

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She then explains that the sister-in-law replied with a passive-aggressive message, telling the couple that her children’s school holidays have now changed and that the date is no longer ‘convenient’ for her.

Adding: “Her attitude was that we should change it. She made a big thing of how they’d probably not manage to get over for that weekend because they’d have to ask for a day off school.

“My fiancé was really upset by her message. He hasn’t messaged her at all, since. After a night of processing what she’d said, I found a polite way of saying that it’d be nice if their family could make it over, but we understood if they couldn’t, and we could always Zoom video call the wedding.”

Despite offering an olive branch, the sister-in-law has ignored her messages despite responding to other people in the group.

The couple is reluctant to change their wedding date but worries that a rift is forming.

However, people responding to the post were unimpressed by the sister’s demands and behaviour.

A person said: “If your SIL can’t go then she can’t go maybe it’s better she doesn’t! She’s being difficult.”

Another wrote: “I’m sure you won’t be able to change the date whether your fiancé’s sister wants to or not, since you will have paid deposits for your bookings, won’t you? She is being very unreasonable because your dates have been known for a while. It’s not your fault that it is now inconvenient for your SIL-to-be. It’s unfortunate but the only recourse is to look for a manageable way round and if it can’t be done, they’ll just have to send their regrets. It’s just the way it goes.”

One commented, saying: “Your SIL is making it all about her. It’s not. It’s your day and she knows this. If she can’t make it that’s her choice but if you’ve already sent out Save The Dates then other guests will have booked time off and made travel/hotel arrangements.”

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