‘My in-laws are fuming over the meal I cooked for them – they think it’s inappropriate’

An exhausted new mum has shared her frustration after her in-laws complained about the food she cooked them as they deemed it an ‘inappropriate’ meal for hosting

Extended family cooking together
The meal was branded ‘inappropriate’ (stock photo)

After giving birth four weeks ago, a tired new mum was in no mood to have guests over for dinner, but agreed to have her in-laws over so they could meet the baby.

She asked her husband if they could just get takeout instead, but he wouldn’t hear of it, insisting that she could prepare anything for them as long as it was homemade.

Trying to think of an easy option, the exhausted mother claims she made a mac and cheese dish, thinking that this would be fine. However, when she served this to her parents-in-law, she couldn’t believe their “appalled” reaction.

After she asked her mother-in-law what the matter was, she replied that she didn’t think the meal was “appropriate”, remarking that she had no “experience in what is right and wrong when it comes to hosting”.

The exhausted new mum couldn’t face making a more complicated dish (Stock Photo)


Getty Images)

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Taking to Reddit, the stunned daughter-in-law wrote: “I said ‘excuse me? Who said I signed up to host an expected visit from them?’ and she took it as in I didn’t want them there.

“Her husband said they were just there to finally see the baby that I kept them from seeing for an entire month. That’s a whole month of his life they ‘missed’ out on.

“We had an argument and they decided to go home. My husband said that deciding to serve his family mac and cheese was more offensive than serving them nothing at all.

“I told him I was too exhausted to cook their ‘traditional feasts’ that I was forced to learn from his mom. He took offence and said that I was being mean and disrespectful towards not only his family but his culture.”

The poster – who goes by the username u/Dinner101____ – continued: “I went inside the bedroom to stay with my son. My husband stayed on the phone with his family for an hour then kept giving me the cold shoulder and refused to eat what I cook in support of his family.

“I understand how some guests might find it offensive especially his family. but I was just trying to make a quick homemade meal as my husband wanted. What’s wrong with mac and cheese?”

Fellow Reddit users have reassured the poster that her in-laws’ behaviour was completely not on, with mac and cheese being a perfectly suitable dinner to make.

One person wrote: “This isn’t a culture clash – these people are just ***holes. There isn’t an Asian culture I’m aware of that doesn’t practice some form of postpartum confinement where it is expected that the new mother does nothing other than rest and bond with the baby.

“If they were so ‘traditional’ they should have showed up with food, offered to clean the house, and run a load of laundry while they’re at it.”

Another said: “I’m Asian and if anything, it’d be my relatives coming over and bringing me food. No one would expect an exhausted new mother to cook a whole feast.”

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