A bride-to-be has said she’s perfectly happy for her fiancé’s niece to wear a suit to her wedding – but the teenager’s mum is furious she won’t be forced into a dress
Image: Getty Images)
A woman who told her soon-to-be niece that it’s perfectly okay for her to wear a suit to her wedding has been left baffled after the teenager’s mum told her to “pressure” her into wearing a dress.
Posting on Reddit, the woman explained she’s due to get married next year and has extended an offer to her fiancé’s 15-year-old niece to be part of her bridal party, as she’s the only niece or nephew on either side of their families.
The woman recently met with the teenager, as well as her parents – who are the groom’s brother and sister-in-law – and noticed she was dressed “a lot more androgynous” than she remembered her being, and every time bridesmaids dresses were mentioned, the teen was visibly “uncomfortable”.
So, the bride-to-be told her she didn’t have to wear a dress, as another member of her bridal party would be wearing a trouser suit anyway.
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In her post, she said: “I am getting married to my fiancé next year. After we got engaged, I suggested it might be nice if I asked my fiancé’s niece if she wanted to be a bridesmaid too.
“Cut to a few weeks ago and we’re in my fiancé’s hometown to visit his family and discuss wedding-related stuff. His brother, sister-in-law and their daughter came over and I noticed this time that she was dressed a lot more androgynous than I remembered.
“The topic moved to wedding dresses and bridesmaid’s dresses and I could see she was immediately uncomfortable. Her parents and grandma were making comments about how she’d need to be more feminine and how nice it would be to see her like that. Eventually, her mother made a comment along the lines of, ‘it’ll be nice to see you dressed like a girl for once’, and she looked really sad/embarrassed/upset.
“In response, I immediately told her that my maid of honour would be wearing a trouser suit for the wedding and not a dress, and that I’d given all the bridesmaids the option of wearing anything they want as long as it’s in the ‘wedding colour’.
“I pulled out my phone and started showing her photos of the ideas my friend had sent me and let her know that she could pick anything at all she wanted – she could even wear jeans and trainers if that made her comfortable – and that it’s a wedding, not a fashion show.”
And while the news seemed to put the teen at ease, her mum was left furious at the idea that her daughter wouldn’t be wearing a dress to a wedding.
In fact, she even contacted her brother-in-law to try and “pressure” his wife-to-be into making “all the bridesmaids” wear dresses so that the teenager would be forced to do so too.
The woman added: “My niece perked up a bit when I said that but her mum looked really p***ed off. She’s since asked my fiancé to pressure me into getting all the bridesmaids dresses so their daughter will have to wear one.
“My husband doesn’t give a s**t what she wears, but obviously also doesn’t want his family and me to be arguing on the wedding day. I don’t want to back down because I know what it feels like to be pressured into wearing something that makes you uncomfortable, but on the other hand, I know it’s only for a day and it’d make the family happy.”
Commenters on the Reddit post praised the woman for sticking up for the teenager, and told her not to back down under any circumstances – even if it would save arguments on the day.
One person said: “Don’t back down. Stand your ground. Never in my life had I thought I would be urging someone to be a bridezilla. Please. Please. Be the bridezilla. Go full bridezilla.”
While another added: “You are not overruling her parents. This is your wedding, your decision. Not their decision to make. I’m so glad your niece has someone like you in her corner!”
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