A man took to Reddit to ask users for advice on whether he did the right thing by secretly taking his daughter to the hairdressers to get her hair shaved off – and most people were on his side
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Not everyone is going to be on the same page when it comes to co-parenting.
But one man has revealed how he let his daughter shave her head even though his wife begged him not to.
And while you’d expect people to slam his decision, some have praised him for doing the right thing by his daughter.
Taking to Reddit, the dad explained that his eight-year-old daughter Anna* had very thick, blonde, curly hair down past her waist.
While Anna hated her hair, her mum was “obsessed” with it and was against her ever getting it cut.
“Ever since she was a toddler, (my wife would) spend hours doing her hair every day, braiding it, straightening it and styling it in all sorts of ways,” he wrote.
“Our bathroom cabinets are always filled to the brim with a bunch of hair lotions, oils, creams and other fancy products.”
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Anna, however, has never been too fond of getting her hair done.
“While it looked lovely, she hated getting it brushed and every morning used to be a screaming fest between her and my wife,” he explained.
“Lately, she’d been begging for a shorter haircut. My wife ignored her whenever the topic was brought up in hopes that she’d forget about it, but none of that ended up happening.”
Getting nowhere with her mum, Anna asked her dad to take her instead.
“I was reluctant to at first because I didn’t know how my wife would react, but I agreed when I saw just how excited the kid was over something as simple as a haircut,” he said.
So while his wife was at work, the man drove his daughter to the hairdresser.
“She got to flip through a lot of magazines and pick a picture of a haircut. And when she chose a really short clipper cut, I knew I was gonna be in deep s*** with my wife,” he wrote.
“At that point though, there was no turning back. I mean, what could I have really done? Told her that no, she can’t get the haircut she was so over the moon about?
“By the end of it, Anna couldn’t stop smiling. She went around the salon showing it off to everyone and even asked me to take a bunch of pictures even though she normally hates having pictures taken of her,” he wrote.
“We did get one rude comment from an older woman at the salon, something along the lines of ‘You can’t even tell if she’s a boy or a girl now’, but Anna was way too excited about her hair to notice.”
When he returned home with his daughter, his wife was furious.
“She refused to even look at Anna, locked herself in her room and cried then got in the car and drove off,” he said.
“I knew she wouldn’t react well to the haircut but I wasn’t expecting her to take it this badly. The kid’s upset too and no matter how much I reassure her she still thinks she’s in trouble for getting her hair cut.
“I realise how attached my wife was to Anna’s hair, but at the end of the day I still think it’s just hair. The kid’s old enough to decide these things for herself and she was really happy with the haircut.”
Reddi users were quick to share their thoughts on the man’s situation, and while many said he was in the wrong for going behind his wife’s back, others said he did the right thing by his daughter.
One person said: “She sounds like she considers her daughter a Barbie doll to play with and doesn’t even consider her a human with feelings. Wife needs therapy.”
Another wrote: “What your wife has been doing and is continuing to do is sending the message to Anna that her body is not her own, and despite her own desires, she should put other people’s feelings about what she does with her body first. Is this really the message you want your daughter learning?”
But a third said: “Soft [you’re the a**hole], but not for letting the kid have a haircut she wanted, that part is fine. For not taking the time and effort to sit down with your wife first and talk it out, try and see why she was so attached to the hair, try and get her to see that it’s really the kid’s call, look for a solution.”
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